July has been tough. The heat isn’t the only thing taking it’s toll. From health scares to water leaks, this has definitely been a month I’d sooner forget. I don’t know if the sheer exhaustion of it all is veering into delirium, but this morning I have decided I’ve had enough. Time to pack up the pity party and smell the roses.
Being stuck indoors for a few weeks can really do some damage on the psyche. Not getting enough Vitamin D really can affect your mood – my children and I can definitely attest to that. Lack of fresh air has definitely made us irritable, cranky and stir crazy. If we could spend the majority of our day outdoors, we would. Unfortunately it hasn’t been in the cards as of late. But instead of continuing to get upset, I am going to force myself to looking at the bright side. It’s been a while since I posted, but it’s been a bit chaotic here but I will try to post more soon.
Facing the Rainbow Bridge
Let’s start with Tequila. Not the drink, though a few shots may have helped this month. We’re talking about my first born – our 13 year old black lab mix. What started out as a morning of fun quickly turned to a heartbreaking nightmare when we got home and our boy was stumbling around, shaking and barely able to stand. His right eye was twitching, he was breathing erratically, shaking and tilting his head to one side. I was scared and crying, the girls were scared and crying, and poor Brian had to think clearly on what to do next.
We called the vet who instructed us to head over to Blue Pearl and have him seen immediately. We called my parents to come over and watch the girls so we could take our boy in. But what do we say to them? At 2 and 4, how much can they understand? Some people may tell their kids that everything will be OK. But our girls are smart, they know when something is wrong and are very empathetic – especially with me. I couldn’t lie to them – what if we had to make the decision? What if their beloved brother wasn’t going to be fine?
They’ve seen pets die in movies and Bailey has asked about death before. It was a quick decision but we talked about how much we love Bubba and how pets don’t stay on this earth as long as people do because their hearts are so big and they give us so much love, that their time with us is short. It was heartbreaking but I didn’t know what else to do. We left with most of us in tears and rushed him to the emergency vet.
The whole way there I ran through all of my favorite memories, hugging his shaking and scared body, praying that he wasn’t in pain. The techs brought a cart out to bring him inside and we waited in a room while they examined him in the back. As the vet walked in, we were prepared for the worst. When he started talking about vestibular syndrome and inner ear infections, I couldn’t quite wrap my head around everything. He was going to be fine, it was very common in older dogs, we just needed to keep him calm and safe so he could heal. What? How was this so common that we’d never heard about it? I don’t think I can really remember what the vet told us all I heard was that our boy was going to be ok.
We called Gigi to give her the good news and I Google’d everything I could about vestibular syndrome so I could prepare us for what was to come. To sum it up, he basically had vertigo x 10 all the time and he couldn’t be left alone, go down stairs, walk on hardwoods, etc. We got him home and the emotional roller coaster we had all just been on set in – the girls were wired and we were completely exhausted.
For the next several days we had to be next to him at all times. We carried him wherever he needed to go. We had to help him drink water, hand feed what little he ate, helped him go to the bathroom, etc. If I left the room, one of the girls had to sit next to him and pet him so he didn’t try to get up and hurt himself. We had to get him a babysitter (Gigi and Pop Pop) when we had to take the girls to dance. To say it was stressful would be an understatement. There wasn’t much sleep, my back was aching (a 55-60lb lab is not light) and the only outdoor time was when we carried him outside to go to the bathroom. It was rough and definitely took a toll.
The Bright Side
Even during the worst of it, the thing that kept us going was all the support we recieved. My parents, as always were there for us at the drop of a hat. They love their grandson as much as we do (even if one of them tries to deny it) and helped us in more ways than I can count. The girls were the best little sisters – they cleaned up and kept the floors and couches clear to keep Bubba safe. They read to him, gave him lots of snuggles, helped feed him and give him medicine. Our friends and even strangers that shared their experiences – we are so grateful for the advice and the ear you gave. My husband, my rock and the keeper of the calm. Without you, I’m not sure I could have gotten through this. And Tequila, you have brought me so much joy and comfort these past 13 years. Thank you for trusting me enough to get you through this and for showing me, Brian and the girls so much love everyday. I count my blessings that you are getting back on your feet and that we have more time with you.
I’ve tried to avoid thinking about Tequila getting older, and still tear up whenever I do. However, I now know that I will be able to handle whatever comes, will do whatever it takes to make sure that he is happy and comfortable. I am so fortunate to have so many wonderful memories with him – and laughable ones. And even more fortunate to have such an amazing support system and caring people in my life to help me through everything.
Taking a Health Hit
Just as Tequila was getting back on his feet, Bailey was starting to come down with something. My spirited, sweet girl who has a tough as nails immune system started losing her spark last week. She started out a little extra tired then developed a fever. By the 4th day of a fever with little to no sleep, I called the pediatrician and they said if the fever and cough were still there the next day to bring her in. When she woke up coughing the next day we knew it was time to take her in.
Her pediatrician took one look at her throat and ordered a strep test. The first few minutes were negative but they were going to let it go overnight and would call us with the results in the morning. All we had to do was wait and see what to do next. We kept her on Tylenol and extra fluids and hoped for the best.
She coughed most of the night but was able to sleep well into the morning. But when she sat up and started coughing so hard she was gagging, I knew we needed to call the after hours line. The pediatrician called back to inform us the strep was negative but after hearing her over the phone and after the new symptoms we described, she told us to head over to Children’s Mercy Urgent Care and get her seen again.
Gigi met us up there to take Sienna while we went back, though not before scraping her knee and face planting in front of the check in – I think she was trying for a 2 for 1 special (Sienna, not Gigi). We got back to the room and met with the nurse practitioner. She was amazing, so kind and made us all feel comfortable and really listened to us. She was concerned with the cough and the length of her fever so she sent us back to do a chest x-ray.
Now this wasn’t my first experience with a chest x-ray – Sienna had to have one when she swallowed something she shouldn’t have and it took 5 of us to strap her into this cylinder to get a photo. It was such a circus that I didn’t have a chance to reflect. But seeing Bailey standing in front of the x-ray machine with her little gown on, looking at me with those scared eyes, had me choking up.
We had to wait a bit for the results so we tried to keep our girl entertained as best we could. She was definitely not thrilled with the hospital gown she was wearing because it wasn’t as fancy as the dress we came in was. The nurse came back in and said she had pneumonia in her left lung and I almost lost it. How could I have let this happen? I had followed all the rules but somehow my baby that never gets sick has pneumonia…in the middle of summer. Mom guilt definitely set in but I kept it together as we looked at the x-ray together and discussed treatment options.
We met up with little sis and Gigi, gave them the news and then decided to check out the puppies next door to lift our spirits. We picked up her meds and treated her to a Sonic slush that we hoped would help ease her sore throat. Then chaos set in. Sienna didn’t want to wait in the back so of course Bailey didn’t either. They both sat up front with us as we waited for our drinks and decided to push every button (literally and figuratively), almost blew out our speakers and then Bailey stood up, said she was going to be sick and proceeded to puke all over the back seat. She managed to hit both car seats, my work bag, her doll and everything in between. Awesome. And we still had to wait about 10 more minutes for our order to arrive. We cleaned up the best we could, got our drinks and got home as quickly as we could.
We got home, got the girls cleaned up and settled and Bailey’s temperature spiked to 104.4 and her breathing was really jumpy. After a call with the nurse, we were reassured that this was normal. Then Gigi and Pop Pop came to check on our patient while Dad took the car to get shampooed (in the 98* heat). The culmination of another week with limited outdoor activity erupted and we were left with two hyper-cranky kids that had full fledged meltdowns about everything from a misinterpreted look to Dad eating the last of the Penguin crackers (end of the world).
Turning Lemons to Lemonade
Pneumonia isn’t good, but it’s definitely not the worst thing that can happen. I may have blamed myself for not catching it sooner, but I am so fortunate that both girls are usually very healthy. There are so many other families that aren’t as fortunate and my heart goes out to them. I am once again so blessed to have such wonderful parents that have given us so much of their time to make us smile, let us nap and keep us a little more sane – and for going to the store to pick up some more Penguins. I also could not have gotten through this without my hubs who took some time off work and kept Sienna happy and sleeping so I could focus more on Bailey.
Taming a Wild Child
That brings us to our littlest wild child, Sienna. She is definitely a little firecracker that does not like to take “No” for an answer. I know this may be a positive attribute in the future, but it is definitely challenging right now. She is constantly trying to test the limit, whether she is hurling her body off of things or using colorful language, she likes to be extreme. She has also learned to open and lock doors, which I have learned both the hard way. She wants to do everything her sister does and has a vicious temper when she doesn’t get her way.
She’s my little Sour Patch kid – can be sour but ends with a lot of sweetness. We are working on controlling her craziness and surviving the terrible twos, but we love her with all our hearts. We’re so fortunate to have such a funny, sassy baby girl and couldn’t imagine this crazy roller coaster without her.
When it Rains, it Pours
The weather this year has been all over the map and it hasn’t done us any favors on the house front. We had a leak in the basement, a leak from our toilet and our front porch rail has officially kicked the bucket. My car has broken down while I was driving alone with the girls and the AC knob broke. It has been a pretty expensive month so far and that doesn’t include the medical and vet bills.
This would normally send my type-A-ness into a bit of a panic because there are a lot of unplanned expenses and a ton of things out of my control. Instead, I am going to sit back and reflect on all that I have to be thankful for.
I’m thankful for the roof over our head and the cars that get us where we need to go. I’m thankful for our health, though it may knock us flat a few times, it always makes us stronger. I’m thankful for the work we have that allows me to stay home and care for our babies and that allows for the flexibility for us to spend time together. I’m thankful for the friends that I miss dearly but can always pick up where we left off when we’re together. I’m thankful for our amazing family and support system that has been there for us throughout everything, but more recently through this rough month. I’m thankful for a loving, caring adorable pup that I’ve been fortunate to have by my side for more than 13 years. I’m thankful for my two spirited, beautiful and sweet girls that I love more than I ever thought possible. And I’m thankful for my handsome, handy and hard working husband who not only keeps our boat floating, but keeps us all laughing and sane in the process.
It’s been a rough road these past few weeks but it has really made me realize how fortunate we are. We wouldn’t mind a break during this storm, but in the meantime we will be stopping to smell the roses.
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